06 February 2014

Second Half of Senior Year

I've come to realize in the month I've had to be a second semester senior in high school, that something is wrong with me.

I'm not too sure what it is, but I seem to be a little bit...off?

I'm always on top of my school work, I know what is due when and how and where, but lately, I don't know the difference between left and right. And that is bad, yes, I know. I need to buckle down and keep doing as good as I have been.

I think that I have a lot on my mind, there is still all the college applications and the scholarship applications, and finishing senior year with good grades (maybe some senior slide towards the end?), I've also found my mind wondering to all the end of the year senior activities, and all the other awesome senior-y things I'll be doing with my class, I'm thinking about graduation and college.

I should be focused on now.

Do you ever do that? You just, find yourself at a stand-still, your life is on the verge of closing one chapter and starting a new one, and you keep thinking about the next chapter, but you need to focus on the one you're on right now? Does that make sense? I feel like, I'm so close to the next step of my life, but I'm still trying to complete this step, but I am stumbling a little bit.

I really need to focus on my grades, hence why I haven't been blogging all that much. I find myself going into the week with nothing to do, and as the week begins I have mountains and mountains of things to do, people to see, and homework to do. I'm throwing essays left and right and I'm taking tests and quizzes like there is no tomorrow, I'm studying and outlining history and psychology chapters. ROUGH.

Sometimes I feel like I'm carrying a huge stack of books and papers and, occasionally, I trip over a pebble and everything just, falls to the floor, and I find myself trying to pick everything up but it gets so complicated.

I think I need to take a breather, and write more things down in my planner.

I hope this all made sense, I used a lot of metaphors....

So, yeah, life is complicated and rough and sometimes it makes me want to cry because it slaps me in the face when I least expect it. But, graduation is in May, so I have to keep going till then.

Then...summer 2014, woah.

But for now, keep an eye out for a blog post about my Emblem3 concert this month! :) -J